Who I am?

Nov. 29th, 2010 09:03 pm
disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
 A Mongrel Witch.

I would love to say I follow an ethnically correct tradition, but quite frankly wtf would that be? My heritage is English, Welsh, Irish, possibly a bit of Scots with a hefty dose of Bangladeshi...

My mum was born in London, not one mile away from where she was born.
My dad was born in Birmingham.
My mum's mum was born in Leicester
My mum's dad was born in London (I think) His mum was Welsh. His dad was Irish.
My dad's mum? The Midlands (I think there is more Irish there)
My dad's dad would have been the bit of India that became East Pakistan (1947), that become Bangladesh (1971).

Does that mean I can pick and choose which Celtic Witchery I like, and add in a big dose of Islamic mysticism. (And/or Hinduism?) If I go back far enough in my British history, since I have ancestors from the North, will there be Viking blood? Should I add in Norse Asatru?

It literally makes my head ache.

disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
A green baby Grasshopper crawled/jumped onto my Midsummer Altar. I didn't manage to get very good photos of it.

The symbolism of Grasshopper is this.

"The grasshopper is a fabulous messenger of ingenuity, resourcefulness, joy and honor. She speaks to artists, and inspires dance, song, and music.

Further, the grasshopper is considered a good luck symbol in Japanese culture. Further, it’s a good luck charm as well as a symbol of fertility among Chinese symbolic language.

The grasshopper’s coloring is significant. For instance, green grasshoppers indicate fresh starts (new beginnings), as well as the concepts of youth, rejuvination, sentimentality, nature, adventure, growth and health."
Found here, http://www.symbolic-meanings.com/

The Story of the First Grasshopper.
Im a country that is far away there once lived a young man called Tithonus. He was strong and beautiful. Light of heart and light of foot, he hunted the deer or danced and sang the livelong day. Every one who saw him loved him, but the one that loved him most was a goddess named Aurora.
Every goddess had her own work, but the work of Aurora was most beautiful of all, for she was the goddess of the morning. It was she who went out to meet the sun and to light up his pathway. She watched. over the flowers, and whenever they saw her coming, their colors grew brighter. She loved everything beautiful, and that is why she loved Tithonus.
"Many a year have I roamed through this country," she said to herself, "but never have I seen such bright blue eyes as those. O fairest of youths," she cried, "who are you? Some name should be yours that sounds like the wind in the pine-trees, or like the song of a bird among the first blossoms."
The young man fell upon his knees before her. "I know well," said he, "that you are no maiden of the earth. You are a goddess come down to us from the skies. I am but a hunter, and I roam through the forest looking for deer."
"Come with me, fairest of hunters," said Aurora. "Come with me to the home of my father. You shall live among my brothers and hunt with them, or go with me at the first brightness of the morning to carry light and gladness to the flowers."

So it was that Tithonus went away from his own country and his own home to live in the home of Aurora.

For a long time they were happy together, but one day Aurora said, "Tithonus, I am a goddess, and so I am immortal, but some day death will bear you away from me. I will ask the father of the gods that you too may be immortal."
Then Aurora went to the king of the gods and begged that he would make Tithonus immortal.
"Sometimes people are not pleased even when I have given them what they ask," replied the king, "so think well before you speak."
"I have only one wish," said Aurora, "and it is that Tithonus, the fairest of youths, shall be immortal."
"You have your wish," said the king of the gods, and again Tithonus and Aurora roamed happily together through forest and field.
One day Tithonus asked, "My Aurora, why is it that I cannot look straight into your eyes as once I did?" Another day he said, "My Aurora, why is it that I cannot put my hand in yours as once I did?"
Then the goddess wept sorrowfully. "The king of the gods gave me what I asked for," she wailed, "and I begged that you should be immortal. I did not remember to ask that you should be always young."
Every day Tithonus grew older and smaller. "I am no longer happy in your father's home," he said, "with your brothers who are as beautiful and as strong as I was when I first saw you. Let me go back to my own country. Let me be a bird or an insect and live in the fields where we first roamed together. Let me go, dearest goddess."

"You shall do as you will," replied Aurora sadly. "You shall be a grasshopper, and whenever I hear the grasshopper's clear, merry song, I shall remember the happy days when we were together."

disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
There is the tiniest of possibilities that we may have the opportunity to move very very far away.  I am not saying more than that at the moment, until I have some news either way.

However it does get me thinking about if we did get out there, where would it take my Paganism and Witchcraft? As far as I am aware I would probably be The Only Witch In The Village, so where would that leave me?

Also, as far as Those Who Cannot Be Seen and The Powers That Be, well, the Islands have only be populated for the last 150 years or so by the British, and there are no indigenous people. (if there once were, they are long gone, and there is no sign that they were ever there.) So how do you develop a relationship with a completely new land, almost completely untouched by human hands?

Historically people have just taken their God/desses with them, and incorporated them into their new lives. But what of the indigenous spirits and landwights? Will the Fae be there?

I suppose really, this is something that I should think about more if we get to go, but still it makes me wonder...
disenchantedenchantress: (Default)


Ceridwen was a Welsh goddess of unknown attribute. Some would call Ceridwen a witch, and she was often depicted as an old hag. She had the ability to shift-change.

Ceridwen was the wife of Tegid Foel. Ceridwen was the mother of a daughter named Creirwy, and had two sons, Morvran ab Tegid and Morfran (Y Fagddu or Afagddu). Creirwy was the fairest maiden in the world, while Morvran was ugly but a strong warrior. However her youngest son, called Afagddu or Avagddu ("utter darkness"), was extremely ugly (and perhaps deformed) that no one would accept him in the noble society, unless he was gifted in wisdom and poetry.

From the cauldron of inspiration, known as Amen, Ceridwen was determined to make her son, the wisest and most inspirational bard from three drops of her brew.

However the brew would take a whole to make, so he had two servants to keep the fire lit and continuously stirred the cauldron. One of the servants was named Gwyon Bach (Gwion Bach). Her plan was in ruined when three drops scalded Gwyon Bach's thumb, making Gwyon put his finger in his mouth. Gwyon instantly gained the knowledge and skill of the bard, instead of her son Afagddu.

Ceridwen in rage, set out to kill Gwyon. Gwyon and Ceridwen went through several metamorphoses of different animals. Gwyon as a hare, Ceridwen as a greyhound; he as a salmon, she as an otter; he as a bird, while Ceridwen had transformed into a hawk. When Gwyon turned himself into a grain of seed, Ceridwen as a hen, swallowed Gwyon, and became pregnant.

When Ceridwen gave birth to a son, she knew her child was really reincarnation of Gwyon Bach, who retained memory of his previous life, as well as his skill as a bard. Ceridwen had intended to kill the infant, but could not bring herself to perform such murder, because of the baby's beauty. So Ceridwen put the baby in a leather bag and threw him into the sea.

Elphin (Elffin) rescued the child from the weir, and he named the infant (Gwyon Bach), Taliesin.

See Taliesin in the Mabinogion.

Not much is known about Ceridwen beyond the story of Taliesin, though her name and her cauldron appeared frequently in allusions of medieval Welsh literature.

Nothing more was said about her son, Afagddu. In the story of Culwch and Olwen, it mentioned that Ceridwen's other son, Morfran had also fought in the battle of Camlann, sustaining no wound, because he was so ugly that the enemies thought he was demon, would not come near him. Morfran had hair on his face like that of a stag.


Ceridwen From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Ceridwen by Christopher Williams (1910)

In Welsh medieval legend, Ceridwen was an enchantress, mother of Morfran and a beautiful daughter Creirwy. Her husband was Tegid Foel, and they lived near Bala Lake (Llyn Tegid) in north Wales. Medieval Welsh poetry refers to her as possessing the cauldron of Poetic Inspiration (Awen) and the Tale of Taliesin recounts her swallowing her servant Gwion Bach who is then reborn through her as the poet Taliesin.


Ceridwen chased Gwion. He turned himself into a hare. She became a greyhound. He became a fish and jumped into a river. She turned into an otter. He turned into a bird; she became a hawk. Finally, he turned into a single grain of corn. She then became a hen and ate him. When Ceridwen became pregnant, she knew it was Gwion and resolved to kill the child when he was born. However, when he was born, he was so beautiful that she couldn't do it. She threw him in the ocean instead, sewing him inside a leather-skin bag. The child did not die, but was rescued on a Welsh shore - near Aberdyfi according to most versions of the tale - by a prince named Elffin ap Gwyddno; the reborn infant grew to became the legendary bard Taliesin.

Later interpretations

Ronald Hutton suggests that Ceridwen first appeared as a simple sorceress character in the Tale of Taliesin, of which the earliest surviving text dates to the mid-16th century, but which appears from its language to be 9th-century in composition, according to Hutton. References to Ceridwen and her cauldron found in the work of the 12th-century Gogynfeirdd or Poets of the Princes (such as Cynddelw Brydydd Mawr) he thus considers later, derivative works. In them, according to Hutton, Ceridwen is transformed from a sorceress into a goddess of poetry. Citing this and a couple of other examples, Hutton proposes that the Gogynfeirdd substantially created a new mythology not reflective of earlier paganism. Nonetheless, references to Ceridwen's cauldron (pair Ceridwen) are also to be found in some of the early mythological poems attributed to the legendary Taliesin in the Book of Taliesin.

The Victorian poet Thomas Love Peacock also wrote a poem entitled the Cauldren of Ceridwen. Later writers identified her as having originally been a pagan Goddess, speculating on her role in a supposed Celtic pantheon. John Rhys in 1878 referred to the Solar Myth theory of Max Muller according to which "Gwenhwyfar and Ceridwen are dawn goddesses."Charles Isaac Elton in 1882 referred to her as a "white fairy".Robert Graves later fitted her into his concept of the Threefold Goddess, in which she was interpreted as a form of the destructive side of the goddess.

Graves' theory was appropriated by Wicca, in which Ceridwen plays a role as a goddess, her cauldron symbolizing the feminine principle.


disenchantedenchantress: (Default)

A very interesting, and thought-provoking post, as per usual from Hecate's blog.
To Be A Witch

disenchantedenchantress: (evil willow)
I have had enough. The big guns are coming out. Tomorrow night's full moon will see me magicking my socks off to get the situation with Rick* sorted. I have had enough of him being lied to, fobbed off, demoralised, demeaned, and generally made to feel like shite. He has done absolutely nothing wrong. He has held himself with dignity, and totally has the moral high ground in this situation.

He is slogging himself sick to get the situation sorted, when none of it is his responsibility, just that it has a massive impact on him and his family.

I have done mild workings, trying to push things in the right direction, but what has come to light over the last few days has meant that I am now Getting Involved. I can't go in and smack a few "heads" (Hahahaha), but I can do it on the Astral.

Forget this love and light bollocks. [personal profile] disenchantedenchantress  is Very Unhappy, and Very Angry. I will Play Nice no longer.


Jun. 29th, 2009 01:04 pm
disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
I have at least one huge Toad in my back garden. This makes me very happy!

Am know looking up the meanings of Toad, although so far they are negative witchy connections. I don't mind the Witchy ones, but not so much the "devil-worshipper" ones.

From here


Meaning :  Inner Strength, Luck


The appearance of a Toad heralds a successful time of drawing upon
and using our inner resources. 
Toads are associated with money and luck –
especially changing your luck from bad to good. 
People with a Toad totem can see things and people more clearly. 

A Toad heralds the need for self-examination. 
Ask these questions: 
Am I hesitating to act and missing opportunities? 
Am I allowing fear to hinder progress? 
Have I forgotten my inner strength?

A Toad totem is a representation of the Moon, and represents both Life and Death. 
In alchemy, the Toad signifies the dark side of Nature. 
In the ancient cultures of Mexico, the Toad symbolized the Earth. 


disenchantedenchantress: (Default)

Listen to the words of the Great Mother, who was of old also called Artemis; Astarte; Diana; Melusine; Aphrodite; Cerridwen; Dana; Arianrhod; Isis; Bride; and by many other names.

Whenever ye have need of anything, once in a month, and better it be when the Moon be full, then ye shall assemble in some secret place and adore the spirit of me, who am Queen of all Witcheries.

There shall ye assemble, ye who are fain to learn all sorcery, yet have not yet won its deepest secrets: to these will I teach things that are yet unknown.

And ye shall be free from slavery; and as a sign that ye are really free, ye shall be naked in your rites; and ye shall dance, sing, feast, make music and love, all in my praise.

For mine is the ecstasy of the spirit and mine also is joy on earth; for my Law is Love unto all Beings.

Keep pure your highest ideal; strive ever toward it; let naught stop you or turn you aside.

For mine is the secret door which opens upon the Land of Youth; and mine is the Cup of the Wine of Life, and the Cauldron of Cerridwen, which is the Holy Grail of Immortality.

I am the Gracious Goddess, who gives the gift of joy unto the heart. Upon earth, I give the knowledge of the spirit eternal; and beyond death, I give peace, and freedom, and reunion with those who have gone before. Nor do I demand sacrifice, for behold I am the Mother of All Living, and my love is poured out upon the earth.

Hear ye the words of the Star Goddess, she in the dust of whose feet are the hosts of heaven; whose body encircleth the Universe; I, who am the beauty of the green earth, and the white Moon among the stars, and the mystery of the waters, and the heart’s desire, call unto thy soul. Arise and come unto me.

For I am the Soul of Nature, who giveth life to the universe; from me all things proceed, and unto me must all things return; and before my face, beloved of gods and mortals, thine inmost divine self shall be unfolded in the rapture of infinite joy.

Let my worship be within the heart that rejoiceth, for behold: all acts of love and pleasure are my rituals. And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honour and humility, mirth and reverence within you.

And thou who thinkest to seek for me, know thy seeking and yearning shall avail thee not, unless thou know this mystery: that if that which thou seekest thou findest not within thee, thou wilt never find it without thee.

For behold, I have been with thee from the beginning; and I am that which is attained at the end of desire.


disenchantedenchantress: (Default)

There is theme going round the pagan blogsphere to post up about pagan ethics. Lots of them have made interesting reading. I can't promise that mine will be that interesting though. Sorry.

Although a lot of people think I am everso liberal, I do have ethics. They might not be what other people agree with, but they aren mine. They have little to do with Paganism. I personally feel that I would have the same ethics if I wasn't pagan. (However, if I was a Fundie Christian, I imagine some of them would be a bit different! :P )

My ethics are as follows

Thou shalt use your brain and clear up thy own shit.

And that's it.

I suppose I should explain this a bit. It encompasses a lot.
  • Don't mess up the environment, as you aren't the only one using it. And why should my children and my childrens' children have to clear up your shit?
  • Take responsibilty for your actions. You did it, you deal with it. Whether that be good or bad. If you have wronged someone, then so be it. Sort it out and make it better.
  • If sometimes your intentions aren't the purest, deal with it. Don't make excuses. Know what you are doing and why you are doing it, and if it all goes horribly wrong, make sure you can deal with the consequences.
  • Listen to what others tell you, but just because someone says it's true, doesn't make it so.
It's all about taking responsibility for yourself. Since you are the only person you can truly be responsible for. We are responsible TO others, but not for. We have a responsibilty to our children to bring them up safe, healthy and sane.

Paganism to me, isn't about rules and restrictions. No thou shalt not, and if you do, you are eternally screwed. There is no Higher Power looking at you, wagging a finger. The PTBs give us the choice to choose. Sometimes I don't think it is the choice that is the important thing, it is the choosing.

disenchantedenchantress: http://community.livejournal.com/icons_r_us/3949299.html (Sanity)
I have just finished reading this book. I must admit I did skim through bits of it, but although I found it interesting, I don't think it told me anything new. Perhaps though, that is not the books fault, since it has been out since 1991. (However, it still is quite a bit later than Starhawk's The Spiral Dance - 1979, and Z Budapest's The Feminist Book of Lights and Shadows - 1975.*)

I know people have said this is the book that got them onto their path, and that it is really meaningful to them. I will confess that I haven't had the same connection with it. I did enjoy it, but it didn't "sing" to me. However there will undoubtably be parts of it that I shall be investigating and using.

One of those is the Moon Calendar. Basically you following the moon cycle, and chart your period, moods, etc, etc. I have been marking my period cycle for a few years now, but have been doing it online, and only the date of when it starts. No moods or physical sensations. Well, other than posting I feel like pants on occasion! I am intended to be a bit more thorough and see what patterns come up. Some of it I may post and discuss here, not sure yet.

I have been noticing a post-period dip. Basically a feeling of meloncholy a day or so after my period finishes. I need to find out if there is a change in hormones that causes this. But I would be interested to know if other women experience anything like this. (This may be a time to exercise my google-fu.)

*Although this was republished as The Holy Book of Women's Mysteries: Feminist Witchcraft, Goddess Rituals, Spellcasting and Other Womanly Arts (1989)
disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
I am seriously considering trying to set up a group again. I know there are groups I could go to the further I go into London, but actually travelling in can be time-consuming and expensive. I also am feeling that there MUST be more likeminded local people out there, that aren't either arseholes or flakes.

So what do I have to do? Firstly work out what type of group I want to do? Do I want to set up a Pagan Moot? (A monthly meeting in a pub for socialising/drinking.) A Circle at my home? I honestly don't know. I want to develop friendships with the possibility for working together. Am I looking at a women only group, or a mixed one? A Circle works better with just women, if I am honest, but a Moot works better with men. (Strange how having it in a pub changes the dynamic of a group.)

Then on the other hand, there is a distinct possibility that we will be moving from the area with the next 6 months, so is it worth even trying?

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm, just dunno.

The last time I tried, it was an abject failure. However, I did just ask friends, so maybe opening up to strangers is the answer?
disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
A Christian Witch
A Jewish* Witch
and any other variation of an established patriarchal religion that demonised witchcraft and magick use, and believes only in the One True GodTM Witch.

I just don't understand it, and I have never had anyone explain it in a way that makes me understand. I have had plenty of people tell me that people can believe anything and any way they like. Which is undeniable. That doesn't mean I think they are right in what they believe.

This apparently makes me Teh Evilz and Big Bad [personal profile] disenchantedenchantress . I just wish someone would explain how it is possible to put the two together and make a viable, workable spirituality? Yes, take influence from it, take inspiration from it, but actually calling yourself a Christian Witch?

Why it doesn't work for me:
-Whether you consider witchcraft to be a spiritual path, or a structure of occult skills, both of those views are not compatible with the doctrine of Christian belief. As a Christian, Jesus Christ is the one and only One True God. No Goddess, no Mother Earth, no Female Divine. There can be no divination, no spellwork, no idols, nothing that is actually Witchcraft. So what is it you are actually doing if you are a Christian Witch? (Same goes for all the other religions that have an anti-occult doctrine.)
-It ignores the history of Christianity. The history of violence, anti-homosexuality, anti-women, all those "goodies" that fill the Bible.
-It smacks of an inferiority complex. Being a Witch isn't good enough, it has to be pre-fixed with a label that gives it a respectable meaning. Why can't you embrace and reclaim the word WITCH? If you walk like a duck, and quack like a duck, why do you pre-fix the word duck with chicken?
-It is insulting to Christianity. Not that I really care, but it is. Christianity and all its fellows have established doctrine and laws that you are meant to subscribe to.

If someone can give me some clarity on this, I would be really grateful. I don't think I would ever really change my mind about just being a Witch, but I would love an intelligent and non-emotive answer to my questions. Other than just being mean and horrid! :P

*Being Jewish is not only a religious path, it is a heritage. You are born a Jew. So technically, if you choose the path of Witchcraft, then you are still Jewish and a Witch. A good example of this is Starhawk. She is proud of her Jewish heritage, but still calls herself a Witch...

Not a Jewitch...
disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
This is an interview I did for an old forum. It shall remain nameless as I don't go there anymore, and I don't really have that many fond feelings for it.  It was first posted up in March 2006, so probably similar to my views in someways, and notsomuch in others.  I have commented on my answers in colour where things have changed.

disenchantedenchantress: (Default)
A shiny new blog for me to play with. I have more than one, which is rather embarrassing, since really I don't have masses to say. But I decided I needed a new blog for other stuff. Some of it might get crossposted, some of it won't. I do feel like I have to occasionally censor myself, and frankly it irritates me to do so.

My aim is that this blog becomes more focused on the witchcraft and oogeyboogey side of things, and I want to see where that takes me.  I am not really looking for advice from anyone that bothers reading, although obviously comments and imput is always nice. Recommendations for interesting books, websites and the like are most welcome.

I am still having my spiritual wonderings/confusion, now the pagan side of it isn't an issue, but it's more where it is leading to.  Where do I go next, since I feel like I have sat where I am for the past few years and not significantly gone anywhere. Where does the solitary path lead you when you get past wicca 101, when you don't especially do the wicca thing in the first place?

Questions I need to ask myself, and more importantly answer...
  • Where do I want to go?
  • How do I want to get there?
  • What am I missing?
  • What's next?
  • What's important to me?
I am sure I will think of more.


disenchantedenchantress: (Default)

June 2012

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